Dalam sesuatu perkara tidak sepatutnya kita terlalu berharap untuk dapat pulangan seperti yang diimpikan. I felt so dissapointed today. The whole day.
As I lying down, God said " Dear, don't be like this. You have Me. Get up dear."
Need to confess that since I was born I never have sahabat. Bukanlah tidak ada, ada tapi di setiap persahabatan selalu berakhir dengan pergaduhan. Kadang-kadang kala aku sendiri tak tau dari mana datangnya pergaduhan tu. The end aku sendiri juga, lonely.
Sebab itu aku selalu cakap, dalam sesuatu perkara jangan biasakan diri aku tanpa kehadiran awak , kalau sudah biasa aku tak peduli dengan kehadiran awak. Meaning to say aku tak peduli.
Tapi aku tak nak macam tu.
Sebab aku sayang, jadi aku kena peduli. Aku kena ambil tau. Aku paksa diri, abaikan yang lama.
I'm give up. Give up to hope, to apologise, to smile, to cry, to everything.
I wish if I could change my memory and forget everything that I went pass through. Swear , I want.
I want new looks of me. Please.
Only if myself a machine, I like to "die".
I'm sorry, entry was writting under pressure. Might be I'm too emo.
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